The Do Nothing Button
At last! A button for the modern citizen who has pressed enough! Mount it anywhere and marvel: depressing it initiates nothing, releasing it concludes nothing! There will be no emergencies!
1
★ Shipped across the void — free! Arrives in 5–7 business days.
Technical marvels & measurements
| Functions | 0 |
|---|---|
| Buttons | 1 |
| Emergencies to date | None |
| Activation result | Nothing, instantly |
| Material | Machined aluminum on a solid plinth |
| Point of origin | The edge of the observable universe |
| Certificate no. | 0000-000-000 |
“I pressed it for a century, citizen. Nothing! It works perfectly.”
— Captain Null, The Man of Nothing